Most women mother their boyfriends and husbands unknowingly out of love. What such women fail to realize is that mothering makes your man view you in the same way he views his mom, and that’s just…Ewww!
Although you might find nothing wrong with this at first, you actually don’t want your man to view you the same way he views his mom because he won’t view you as his enchanting sexual goddess. And that’s really what you want if you value intimacy in your relationship, isn’t it?
Although the intentions behind mothering are good i.e. it’s out of love, you like things to be perfect, you want to take charge of the house etc, men feel irritated and disrespected when they are mothered (AKA treated like children).
Most women tend to confuse mothering for nurturing. While they share some similarities and the distinction between the two can often be blurry, nurturing focuses on cooperation to solve problems. Mothering is controlling.
If you are like most women and you don’t really know where you fall, look no further. Below are some of the most important signs to look out for if you want to know for sure if you are mothering your man. They could very well be the reason he is pulling away.
1. You nag him
This is by far one of the most obvious signs of a woman mothering her man. Nagging is a clear sign that you don’t expect your man to do the right thing or don’t trust him enough to keep his word and do what he says he is going to do. If he’s mentioned to you a few times that you are a nag, this is a clear sign that you mother him.
2. He doesn’t bother challenging you anymore
If he used to disagree with you sometimes but he doesn’t challenge you anymore, you probably mother him. Men take such an approach when they feel like disagreeing with you isn’t worth it.
A normal man can’t possibly agree with you on everything which is why you should be worried. He may seem to agree with you on the surface, but deep down he likely disagrees with you and harbors resentment because of it.
3. You do everything for him
This sign is the very essence of mothering. Mothers do everything for their small children. If you do everything for him, you are mothering him. Period!
When you seem to make all the decisions and do all his work for him i.e. do his laundry, pick his clothes, arrange his diary etc., or in simple terms, you look after him, then you are mothering him. He’s not necessarily lazy. He may allow you to do everything for him simply because he feels you don’t value his contribution.
4. You are controlling
This sign also touches on the essence of mothering. Mothers are usually controlling in nature. They usually want to monitor and control every aspect of their children’s lives.
Controlling goes beyond doing everything for him. If you find yourself wanting to control where he goes, how he spends his money, his diet, who he hangs out with etc, you are definitely mothering him. You may be “trying to change him” without even realizing it.
The above information summarizes some of the main signs you should look out for to know if you are mothering your man. While mothering seems kind, endearing, and loving on the surface, it kills a man’s attraction for you and can quickly cause him to pull away from your relationship.
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